I arrived here via a Recommendation from Caroline Ross...I'm glad I did! I wholeheartedly believe in limiting one's own screen time/distractions to model such behavior for our children. When my son was two we got rid of television...it was sort of trendy at the time and honestly, my husband and I always had our heads in books while the television jangled in the background, so it made sense.
When our son was supposed to go to school we decided to keep him at home. As an educator myself (I earned an M.Ed. but did not work in the system), I began reading the unschooling philosophies proposed by John Holt. As a result, we allowed our son to pursue his own interests (history and woodworking) with minimal academic interruptions. As Holt puts it, we allowed him as much freedom "as we [were] comfortable." He is now eighteen-years-old, is online less than an hour a day and has never owned a mobile phone. While we did not explicitly intend to create a focused adult, we did exactly that; he is now a professional furniture-maker. At this point, he is the model for us -- as we are both checking our email, etc. constantly. Your advice is spot on...social media is poison, news rarely informs but rather saps us of our time/attention and email, just like 'snail mail' need only be checked once-a-day and everything will run along just as smoothly.
I have recently deleted my Instagram and Facebook apps off of my phone. And I am practicing putting my phone far away from me when I am home. I just started doing these things so we will see how they go but at the core of why I am doing this is to be an example to my very young daughter and son Who is on the way and to be as disconnected from the Machine as I can be. I am no longer blissfully ignorant of the machine and how is been distracting me so now if I don’t do anything about it I am responsible and I am taking that seriously. The goal is to be a great husband and great father and above all to be an ambassador for Christ. If staying away from the Machine as much as possible will help me do that, then that’s why I have to do.
Thank you for this interesting post! Yes, I knew long ago social media was ruining my attention span (and I was only ever on Facebook, but that was bad enough). I read fewer books; I rarely wrote in my blogs. It was also affecting my attitude and relationships: I was quicker to annoyance and anger and had observed that if I knew someone online and in real life, knowing them online made like them *less.* But I didn’t “pull that plug” until I witnessed a family member subjected to an online mob. That was so horrible it seemed to stop all the dopamine rewards in my brain at once and I knew I had to get off.
But that has also opened the question of what to replace it with. Obviously more reading and writing and real life experience. But I do crave the dialogue and connection: for example, before the internet my favourite part of magazines and newspapers was the letters section. I like the commons, having the diversity of perspectives. So on that note I will be adding a link to your blog on mine!
Great article, Ruth! I am getting rid of my flip phone this month. I try to set a limit of when I am checking out emails. This is a challenge for me b/c it has become my home phone most of the time. My daughter is allowed to have 15 minutes on the computer daily and extra time if there is a research topic/project that she is engaged in.
These are wonderful practical ways to cut the useless distractions and get back to the real. It's heartening to know that there is a movement happening in some corners of the world to move to the margins. To move at human speed... to disconnect from social medias and "news." My Lent practice this years has too included a cut of "news" and I'm all the better for it. I can't see going back to seeking news every day. I'm less involved in useless conversations and have gained back some silent time. My next goal is to disconnect from all social medias (save Substack). I cut twitter a year ago, Instagram days ago and will figure out how to get rid of Facebook soon. I need to give administrative access to someone else in a non-profit I'm involved with, but I digress...
All this to say, thank you for your essay. I look forward to digging in more.
I love that you pointed out some of the shortcomings of Stolen Focus! Hari’s propensity for pointing to societal change, often fails to acknowledge how society is shaped by the ethos of individuals. Thus, if they do not change, nor will the culture that flows from them. It almost feels as though you completed the missing chapter in the book by connecting it to Pilgrim In The Machine’s writings about conviction.
The knowledge that something is harmful is perpetually unpersuasive, because there is so much more tied into bad decision making than simply the mechanisms of distraction. Distraction flows from a deeper spirit of unrest, that may not be eased simply by putting a phone in a box, despite the fact that such practices may be a good start.
Funny that I found this in my inbox while reading Digital Minimalism. Sometimes I feel like God is using every avenue to tell me something. In this case it's to put down my phone.
Good read, one strategy that I use at home is to never leave my cell phone in the same room that I'm in. Over time it really helped me get out of the habit of reaching for my phone out of boredom or when switching from one task to another.
Great article. Thank you for the shout out!
I arrived here via a Recommendation from Caroline Ross...I'm glad I did! I wholeheartedly believe in limiting one's own screen time/distractions to model such behavior for our children. When my son was two we got rid of television...it was sort of trendy at the time and honestly, my husband and I always had our heads in books while the television jangled in the background, so it made sense.
When our son was supposed to go to school we decided to keep him at home. As an educator myself (I earned an M.Ed. but did not work in the system), I began reading the unschooling philosophies proposed by John Holt. As a result, we allowed our son to pursue his own interests (history and woodworking) with minimal academic interruptions. As Holt puts it, we allowed him as much freedom "as we [were] comfortable." He is now eighteen-years-old, is online less than an hour a day and has never owned a mobile phone. While we did not explicitly intend to create a focused adult, we did exactly that; he is now a professional furniture-maker. At this point, he is the model for us -- as we are both checking our email, etc. constantly. Your advice is spot on...social media is poison, news rarely informs but rather saps us of our time/attention and email, just like 'snail mail' need only be checked once-a-day and everything will run along just as smoothly.
Lovely essay...I'm glad to have found you.🙂
I have recently deleted my Instagram and Facebook apps off of my phone. And I am practicing putting my phone far away from me when I am home. I just started doing these things so we will see how they go but at the core of why I am doing this is to be an example to my very young daughter and son Who is on the way and to be as disconnected from the Machine as I can be. I am no longer blissfully ignorant of the machine and how is been distracting me so now if I don’t do anything about it I am responsible and I am taking that seriously. The goal is to be a great husband and great father and above all to be an ambassador for Christ. If staying away from the Machine as much as possible will help me do that, then that’s why I have to do.
Thank you for this interesting post! Yes, I knew long ago social media was ruining my attention span (and I was only ever on Facebook, but that was bad enough). I read fewer books; I rarely wrote in my blogs. It was also affecting my attitude and relationships: I was quicker to annoyance and anger and had observed that if I knew someone online and in real life, knowing them online made like them *less.* But I didn’t “pull that plug” until I witnessed a family member subjected to an online mob. That was so horrible it seemed to stop all the dopamine rewards in my brain at once and I knew I had to get off.
But that has also opened the question of what to replace it with. Obviously more reading and writing and real life experience. But I do crave the dialogue and connection: for example, before the internet my favourite part of magazines and newspapers was the letters section. I like the commons, having the diversity of perspectives. So on that note I will be adding a link to your blog on mine!
Great article, Ruth! I am getting rid of my flip phone this month. I try to set a limit of when I am checking out emails. This is a challenge for me b/c it has become my home phone most of the time. My daughter is allowed to have 15 minutes on the computer daily and extra time if there is a research topic/project that she is engaged in.
These are wonderful practical ways to cut the useless distractions and get back to the real. It's heartening to know that there is a movement happening in some corners of the world to move to the margins. To move at human speed... to disconnect from social medias and "news." My Lent practice this years has too included a cut of "news" and I'm all the better for it. I can't see going back to seeking news every day. I'm less involved in useless conversations and have gained back some silent time. My next goal is to disconnect from all social medias (save Substack). I cut twitter a year ago, Instagram days ago and will figure out how to get rid of Facebook soon. I need to give administrative access to someone else in a non-profit I'm involved with, but I digress...
All this to say, thank you for your essay. I look forward to digging in more.
Ruth, you nailed this!
I love that you pointed out some of the shortcomings of Stolen Focus! Hari’s propensity for pointing to societal change, often fails to acknowledge how society is shaped by the ethos of individuals. Thus, if they do not change, nor will the culture that flows from them. It almost feels as though you completed the missing chapter in the book by connecting it to Pilgrim In The Machine’s writings about conviction.
The knowledge that something is harmful is perpetually unpersuasive, because there is so much more tied into bad decision making than simply the mechanisms of distraction. Distraction flows from a deeper spirit of unrest, that may not be eased simply by putting a phone in a box, despite the fact that such practices may be a good start.
Funny that I found this in my inbox while reading Digital Minimalism. Sometimes I feel like God is using every avenue to tell me something. In this case it's to put down my phone.
Good read, one strategy that I use at home is to never leave my cell phone in the same room that I'm in. Over time it really helped me get out of the habit of reaching for my phone out of boredom or when switching from one task to another.